"...for I am already being poured out, and the time of my release hath
arrived..." 2 Timothy 4:6 Young's Literal Translation
This morning I have two specific moms on my heart. One is my sister and friend Summer, and the other my sister and friend Kandace (my sibling sister).
I received a heart-touching email from my sister Kandace this morning.
She and her husband have been going through the necessary steps to adopt in their state system for the past 2 years. Just two days ago, they finally got a call to take in two young boys ages 9 months and 18 months for foster care.
My sister has struggled with resigning herself to foster care, feeling like she'd have to experience loss constantly, when the children are taken away, since she cannot but pour out her love and not hold back when they are with her. But finally, she and her husband, after much prayer and waiting, have decided to give themselves over to loving whatever children come into their home, whether they get to adopt them or not, and to trust that God is doing what is best for them (the children and them as a couple).
When I hear my sister's heart, and see what she and her husband are doing, my heart overwhelms with joy and compassion because I see the heart of God and His plan for all moms in my sister's story.
Like my sister, we moms who have "our own" children that we bore with our bodies, must give ourselves over to vulnerably loving them, training them, and pouring out our lives into them, not knowing when they may be taken. All moms are foster moms so to speak. It's easy to forget and think of our kids as our own since they were born from our bodies, or, if we adopted, since they are legally ours, but the truth is, God has done through us what His word says He does.
"He administers justice for the fatherless and the widow, and loves the
stranger, giving him food and clothing." Deuteronomy 10:18
By placing a child in our care, God has administered justice for the fatherless. If that child comes through our body, God uses our body. If that child comes through our front door, God uses our door. And to the degree that we are willing to be poured out on these children's lives, loving them, training them, being an example of Christ to them, we are revoking our rights as moms in trade for worshipping God through loving these little ones with redeeming love. Our lives become an offering to God, which is the best, most fulfilling, and most fruitful way to mother a child. Through us He administers justice for the fatherless.
When I looked at the picture of Summer and Zane and their ever growing family of beautifully colored children this morning, after reading the email from my sister, I just felt the heart of God changing me and showing me what He says motherhood is.
It doesn't center on me and my needs, it centers on God administering justice for the fatherless. It doesn't center on me being loved, it centers on me being a vessel through which Christ's redeeming love can capture the hearts of children in my care. It isn't so much about being filled up (though their is great satisfaction and filling in loving children), it is about me being poured out!
I remember singing this song when I was in my church's youth group:
Would you be poured out like wine upon the altar for Me?Would you be broken like bread to feed the hungry?Would you be so one in Me that I may do just as I will?Would you be light, and life and love My Word fulfill?Yes, I'll be poured out like wine upon the alter for You!Yes, I'll be broken like bread to feed the hungry!Yes, I'll be so one in You that You may do just as You
will!Yes, I'll be light, and life, and love Your Word fulfill!
Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering
of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. -Philippians 2:17
My sisters have reminded me this morning of God's will for me as a mom- the beauty and privilege of being poured out like an offering of worship as God administers justice for two boys who would be orphans if I didn't obey God's call on my life.
Lord Jesus thank You for my sisters Kandace and Summer. Thank You for loving me like they are loving the little ones You've entrusted to them. Thank You for reminding me that this is the ecstasy of life... being poured out in love because that's what You did for me! I can't be "life and light and love Your Word fulfill" apart from You. But through You I can do all things. I give You my body, my time, my mind and emotions, my will.... Lord Jesus, please have Your way with me. I trust You to guard and keep that which I've entrusted to You- the hearts and minds of these two little boys. Lord, as Kandace and Wally, Summer and Zane, pour out their lives into the little ones You've brought to them, I pray You would become more and more known to them. That they may know Your love increasingly and Your presence very really. Guard and keep the seeds planted in their little ones.